Are you grieving a loss of someone or something? The coming and going of, and grieving for family members,  pets, lost health, changed lifestyles, traumas and broken relationships is part of this journey we call life. We all grieve at some point.  But it is how we grieve those losses that can be healthy or unhealthy.  And it is not always how long we grieve that counts but whether we are moving  forward in that process–no matter how slowly. Guilt and remorse are often the reasons why we get stuck and that can be harmful to our emotional and physical health.  Here are some tips to help you feel better today.




  1. Forgive yourself and the person or event. Give up the “what if’s” and accept that life is unfolding as it should, even though, at this point, you may not understand.  By releasing them, you are not holding the spirit of the deceased back and you are allowing yourself to live again.
  2. Write a letter to the person, or about the event, and express ALL your fear, anger, rage, remorse and love.  Bury or burn the letter and imagine your deceased receiving the message. Ask for a sign that your dearly beloved has understood. Then surrender to trust and peace for all.
  3. Journal your progress.  When in grief, we often feel that the pain will never ease but  it does get better. Writing a daily summary of your feelings and what  you achieved in the day-e.g. brushing your hair–will reflect your ever-increasing progress.
  4. Give yourself permission to cry, rage, laugh, isolate, be miserable and feel the pain.  What you resist, persists so you cannot go around grief, you have to go through it. The sooner you do this, the sooner the cloud will lift and your old self will return.
  5. Surround yourself with people and an environment that is easy on your wounded soul. Avoid the insensitive people–God bless ’em–who cannot handle your pain. Be gentle with yourself and don’t push the river. Let it unfold in its own time.

When you are able to carry the love for that person in your heart, you will know that the first throes of grief are over.  Then maybe, you will be able to shift from a sense of loss to a feeling of gratitude for having had the gift of that person/event in your life.


Learn more about healthy grieving by watching:  IT’S A NEW DAY!



WEDNESDAY, MAR 6, 2024 @ 6.00 pm/ 

To watch: YouTube –  KelownaNow –  It’s A New Day – Natasha Rosewood.

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